It’s a cycle.
There’s a bunch of voices in my head.
One says, “stop it, you are fine.”
One tells me to think of Orphan Black, Sarah Manning in particular.
One holds up a picture of my sister.
There’s bouts of inspiration. Ideas.
Yes, this makes sense.
Then there’s: well what’s the Point?
What a trip.
I distract myself and find things to obsess over.
Right now it’s Us. I am trying to figure out everything about Us. The theories. The interviews. Lupita Nyong’o’s incredible incredible acting.
I draw parallels. Us and Orphan Black (the clones + nature v/s nurture [edit: omg, down the rabbit hole]). Us and Andhadhun (using the rabbits as a form of symbolism).
Us and Orphan Black and Andhadhun.
The ‘clones’ and nature v/s nurture: the differences in the behaviour of all the sestras, especially Sarah and Helena, but also a sense of similarity (in the care and love for Kira, and the babies). And also, the differences between, in particular, between Adelaide and Red, pre and post the switch.
The rabbits [and down the rabbit hole]: In Adndhadhun, the rabbit gave us the biggest clue as to whether he was blind on both eyes, on one eye, or not blind at all. In Orphan Black, it was down the rabbit hole to go back to the beginning and figure out where the Leda and Castor clones came from. And in Us, the rabbits were food. They’re so many of them [a reference to the cloning of the Tethered – I read this somewhere.] And down the rabbit hole to find a different-but same life like yours [also read this].
I think of my happiest happy song.
I’ll try again tomorrow.
How are you doing?